I help women create confidence through intuitive living and wellness.
It’s easy to question the point of making goals, especially in relation to your health. I ask myself all of the time why it matters. You can’t always feel the effects right away and it seems like an all-consuming effort for sometimes very little progress. Anyone else feel this way? Like, why am I spending so much time on eating foods that fuel me when it’s so much easier to eat simple grab-and-go snacks? Or, why am I investing all of this time into evaluating my emotions when it just leads to pain and frustration? Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we just shut down and lived, in whatever ways were easiest?
The short answer is yes, on the surface this would be so much easier. But, as you further evaluate life and self, you’ll come to realize that there is so much beauty and magic in health and creating goals that are empowering and conducive to self-love. I was chatting with a client the other day about her emotions. She struggles sitting with her feelings because it means she can hide and deflect. When I asked her why, she said that it was because it leads to less pain, less hurt. “I don’t give myself time to feel what’s going on so I don’t feel the hardship”, this is what she told me until we started digging deeper. I then asked her what she struggles with the most and she told me that her biggest struggle is that she pushes others away when it gets too good. She feels isolated because she doesn’t allow herself to get vulnerable with others. My one and only question that shifted her train of thought was: “If you aren’t allowing yourself to be vulnerable with yourself, how will you ever be vulnerable with others.”
Within a second, I saw her face drop and a light bulb go off. We then spent the rest of our session discussing goals and how scary, but necessary, they are. Especially ones pertaining to health; emotional and physical.
When I ask potential clients about what their health goals are, they usually begin with things related to fitness, nutrition, and looks. “I want to lose 10 pounds”, “I want to be able to lift more weight”, “I want to look leaner”. This is only the beginning of the types of responses I hear and though they are common, they don’t really address the root of a goal nor are they necessarily attainable. These are surface-level goals. Relating to my client I mentioned above, her original goal when we talked about coaching was to be able to love her body more. But, that didn’t address the need of evaluating emotions and become vulnerable with herself. She’ll never love her body if she doesn’t love her entire being. Just like losing 10 pounds and being able to lift heavier weights aren’t goals that address mental blocks, overall health, lifestyle, or core reasoning. When talking about health, it’s important to look at the bigger picture of your goals and address the core of why you desire what arises.
Creating goals related to health is critical for growth. Yes, in theory, it would be easier to just let life run its course and hope for the best outcome. But, within time, your body will begin to ache, your emotions will run rampant, and you’ll lack self-awareness and confidence. So, really, no. It’s not beneficial to not have goals pertaining to your overall health and long-term wellness. These components of your will improve longevity and quality of life if you focus on them properly. I don’t know about you but I want to be able to wipe myself when I get older which I won’t be able to do if I don’t continue focusing on mobility and functionality of my body. I want to be able to discuss hard things with my children which will only happen if I’m self-aware enough to address hard emotions going on within myself. I want to be able to look in the mirror and feel proud of the body that carries me which I’ll only be able to do if I continue putting in work towards my self-image. We aren’t here to stay stagnant in this life and goals are what create the movement and flow filled with abundance, joy, and growth.
As a health and confidence coach who focuses on intuitive living and wellness, my client’s health goals tend to look and feel a little different than what you would expect. When developing health-related goals, we focus on feelings and the root issue. For example, we discuss a surface-level goal, such as “I want to lose 10 pounds”, as mentioned above. Though this client may want to lose 10-pounds, we focus on how that pertains to health and the core reasons for this desire. Often, the core reason has little to do with the original thought and a lot to do with health, confidence, and/or self-image. So, we take this goal and break it down. We discuss the motive behind the goal and what health improvements would occur if this was accomplished. We chat about if this goal aligns with our core mission and life values. We then rationally look at if this goal is possible. More times than not, the end goals that we develop have very little to do with looks and external desires and have a lot to do with health and internal factors.
Looking inward at our core desires is tough work. It takes self-reflection and sometimes means we have to turn to hardship and struggles or traumas we’ve experienced. Our subconscious minds impact who we are and how we feel every single day. Our history and the traumas we bury within appear through surface-level emotions and goals (such as not wanting to be vulnerable with others or wanting to lose 10-pounds) but when we stay surface level, our goals die off much quicker than deep, core desires. Our subconscious minds are so powerful that we are aware of what’s possible and what’s not. When we cover our core desires up with surface-level expectations and “goals”, we naturally fall flat and give up on them faster. Our subconscious minds are aware that this won’t serve our longevity or quality of life, even when our conscious self thinks we are creating change. Core desires create lifelong impact, positive or negative. So, not addressing them doesn’t mean they aren’t there rather they will have long-term harmful impacts compared to when you address them head-on and create change.
So, why does any of this matter? How can you create health goals that mean something and will make an impact in your life? First, dig deeper. Whatever your original goal is/was, likely isn’t your actual goal or core desire. So turn inward, even further. Keep asking yourself “why” and “how” until you you feel raw and vulnerable. Then, ask yourself one more time. Is it uncomfortable? Yes. Is it necessary? Absolutely yes. Creating lasting change that matters goes beyond the surface level, always. There needs to be the intention behind your goals for them to last in your life. Reflection looks different for all. You can journal about your goals, you can sit and meditate, you can discuss it with loved ones, you can sit with yourself and keep asking yourself why, you can hire a coach, etc.
Your goals ultimately need to align with your personal mission. If you’ve never created a personal mission statement, I strongly encourage you to do so. If goals don’t align with who you are and your values, then they likely won’t stay strong in your life. You’ll be more likely to give up on them. When your goals are aligned with your mission, you’ll have greater intention to follow through. From there, you’ll be able to cultivate a lifestyle that fosters growth towards your goals. The way that you live and make decisions will naturally impact the likelihood of accomplishing your goals. I discuss in The Way to Wellness that even your small habits impact the bigger goals that you make. Small habits such as waking up and making the bed. Once you create this small habit, your mind will recognize that you are capable of creating lasting change in your life and will naturally feel confident to reach bigger goals and habits.
Creating health goals and sticking to them is internal work, just as much as it is external. Truthfully, the hardest part is just starting and committing to the change. Tomorrow isn’t a day of the week, so stop putting your goals to the side and start today. It will be challenging, especially if you’re allowing yourself the needed time to reflect and dig deeper but the reward far surpasses the struggle. On the surface, there may not seem like a point in creating health goals and putting in the work. But, as you progress, you will feel the shift and the long-term benefits and you’ll see the magic behind the discomfort, the beauty behind progress, and the confidence behind the being.
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